Pair bonding
While I have read about bonded pairs of dogs- usually rescues that need to be adopted together, or photos of people's two dogs curled up on the couch- I have not experienced this among my dogs, but I think Juno and Matsu are bonding up rather closely, so I wanted to hear about others who have seen this. Reilly and Sage are not a pair- they are housemates and playmates, but they'd never share the couch or groom. Rei is very aloof-I mean when I was learning about NK and that they were 'aloof' I thought, geez, how much more aloof can a dog be? I wondered if poor Sage was spurned too much by her, as there were dogs at the field in his younger days that he'd be quite affectionate with- his favorites were a rather fluffy golden retriever and my sister's yellow labrador, pictured below with a young Sage who wanted to cuddle up on the dog bed with her...
I offer this not to suggest that Sage was bonded to the lab, but that he once had a capacity for comfort seeking with other dogs. As a pup. He's probably 5 mo old in that shot. Maybe pups are like that. He still loves Cleo on the rare times he gets to see her, but they dont snuggle anymore.
That just doesnt happen with Reilly. She wont share the couch with anyone- even humans- she'll just leave. And its not that she isnt affectionate sometimes, she can be wiggly and wags her tail a lot, even on rare occasions she will be silly and kissy, but overall she is a very serious, businesslike dog. She donest give anything away!
Juno was very affectionate to Sage and he likes her, too- and they play and nibble groom, but dont relax on a bed together. Matsu however- being a simple happy guy, close to her age, and FWIW (if anything) not only the same breed but her cousin- adores Juno and they play as well as groom each other and will nap right against each other- Juno even tucked herself into his crate one night with him! This is completely new to dogs I have owned...but I think its adorable
Tell me about your pair bonded dogs: how did their relationship grow? how would you define a bonded pair of dogs? what interesting have you noticed with pairs of dogs like that?
I offer this not to suggest that Sage was bonded to the lab, but that he once had a capacity for comfort seeking with other dogs. As a pup. He's probably 5 mo old in that shot. Maybe pups are like that. He still loves Cleo on the rare times he gets to see her, but they dont snuggle anymore.
That just doesnt happen with Reilly. She wont share the couch with anyone- even humans- she'll just leave. And its not that she isnt affectionate sometimes, she can be wiggly and wags her tail a lot, even on rare occasions she will be silly and kissy, but overall she is a very serious, businesslike dog. She donest give anything away!
Juno was very affectionate to Sage and he likes her, too- and they play and nibble groom, but dont relax on a bed together. Matsu however- being a simple happy guy, close to her age, and FWIW (if anything) not only the same breed but her cousin- adores Juno and they play as well as groom each other and will nap right against each other- Juno even tucked herself into his crate one night with him! This is completely new to dogs I have owned...but I think its adorable
Tell me about your pair bonded dogs: how did their relationship grow? how would you define a bonded pair of dogs? what interesting have you noticed with pairs of dogs like that?
Comments
I thought Toby and Bel (Shibas) were well on their way to being pair-bonded. They are two years apart in age. Toby never cared that much about her--he's never really liked other dogs. But she LOVED him. She always wanted to be laying near him. She followed him around. Outside, they'd run, shoulder to shoulder, looking in the same direction at the same time as if they practiced it.
But he bullied her terribly. and then she was two, and tried to kill him, and nearly did. And that was that. He's terrified of all dogs now, and she'd still kill him if she could--nearly 5 years later.
But she's always shown a need to be with other dogs, perhaps because she is a mill dog, and had little interaction with people (who still scare her) but was around a lot of dogs. (This mill wasn't the worst of the worst, and it looked like they kept a lot of dogs in kennels and let the puppies and young ones run in a huge puppy pen, so the puppies, of a variety of different breeds, were all together). She loves puppies, and always has been a good "foster mom" to Oskar (AA), and then to Leo (Kai Ken).
She "loves" Leo. (which I put in quotation marks because who knows what love is to a dog? But it's what we call it when we watch them and see how much they like to be together). She got over some of her enthusiasm for Oskar as he got so much bigger than her, and he resource guards, and he's bit her when he wasn't feeling good, and so after their squabbles, she's cautious with him. But Leo, of course, is a Kai Ken, not an Akita or Shiba. And he's a huge peacemaker--his reaction to any scuffle is to roll over on his back and wiggle. So he's an easy dog for her to deal with. She will follow him around and groom him (for hours if we didn't intervene). And he loves her. He can't stand to not be near her. he lays down next to her, with always a part of him touching her (he would lay ON her if he could, and she'll tolerate his head on her, but she gets annoyed when he tries to flop his whole body on her!)
It's just clear that they really like being together.
It makes me sad, though, because Bel is so unpredictable. Mostly she's wonderful with him. But she's got all her issues--epilepsy and a generally unstable temperament, and she goes from play to murderous in a blink of an eye. She often engages Leo in play, but if it gets too exciting, I can see her go from playful to really aggressive so fast. We have to intervene and calm her down quite often. He doesn't seem to care, but I know she's dangerous, so we really watch them. And it's sad because...she's not healthy....and not a month goes by that I don't think....is this when we have to make the hard decision with her? Her kidneys are failing (and then they get better). She has a bad seizure and we wonder. Or she attacks another dog, and we think....how long are we going to keep doing this? (I do know this--if she ever hurts Leo, she's done. I don't think she would, but sometimes....sometimes she doesn't know what is going on--she's just in fight mode). Now, I've noticed, she struggling to get up--her rear leg is failing (not the one we had surgery on, but the other one). Everytime we're in for another health crisis with her, the vet asks me, gently, if I'm willing to spend the money with her this time. We all know it's coming to the point I won't, and as he said once, well, she could go any day. Or she could live another 10 years and continue to cause trouble. There's no way to tell.
But Leo loves her. And he will be devastated when she's gone. Already, if I take her someplace (rarely) and leave him, my husband said he's agitated, looking for her. She won't settle if I take Leo someplace and leave her.
Pairbonded? If not yet, then they are leaning toward it.
(sorry this is so long...it just did strike a nerve, because I've been noticing it with them, and it makes me sad).
I'd say mine are but its kind of uneven. Saru is very independent, so he will ignore Ciqala leaving her chasing him around the house trying to lay down with him. I usually wake up to find them balled up in a corner together. However when Saru wants to play there's a 50/50 chance Ciqala isn't up for it and shows teeth. They usually have morning make out sessions... i'm not sure why- maybe it's to capture each others morning breath? but it always wakes me up. It does make it a breeze for coping with change and my absence since they can seek out each other for comfort and not have to rely solely on me.
Arkane is in puppy classes at Petsmart, and when hes there by himself he is kind of lifeless.. Take Nare in there and hes bouncing around with endless energy. Maybe its because he knows that Nare will back him up, but there is something there.. Nare doesn't like it when dogs lay on him, but he will curl around Arkane or rest his head on/near him.
And btw @wrylybrindle - CUTE cute Sage puppy pick!!!!
They are very physically affectionate and can be seen literally making out daily. Mika loves cuddling with her Koda. It really is so sweet to see them together. They have never disagreed on anything and Koda is a happier dog with her here.
@jellyfart - Warning - you'll get me babbling here!! lol
Well, at the beginning of this summer we had Mirra and Saydee (Saydee was a german shepard/dobie mix we *think*). Saydee was 2-3 years older than Mirra, both of them were female - they got along well as Mirra was the pup brought in over 6 years ago and was raised with Saydee, but Saydee was starting to mentally be "off" the last couple of years with some other physical issues as well. Saydee never really cared about much in life except Jason and food, so she didn't really care one way or another, that we could tell, about the new additions. Mirra was the one I was concerned about regarding bringing in new addtions as in her past we had had conflicts with other dogs... turns out it was only because she was more feral in her play style (the husky part of her) and the dogs she was having issues with either wanted to control her actions (herding dogs) or were intimidated by her playing style. When we saw how the Kai play naturally we said, "Ah! That is exactly how Mirra plays, maybe (hopefully) this will work" That combined with the fact that we had learned that Kai's, generally speaking, really understand "dog rules" we thought it would be a good fit. We figured the Kai would be a good fit for us as a family so, we went from there.
Kitora (female) and Ritsu (male) came to us together as new additions, but Ritsu needed to go back to Yamabushi, nothing to do with him being male - just for his safety with the older Kai placement issues that we've all read about. He got along really well with our existing dogs also - I was so tickled to see Mirra play with him as well as Kitora the new female pup. So after Ritsu went back, we had the 3 girls until Kunai came along...(male) Later, we had to make the hard decision to put Saydee down so now it is Mirra (female) Kitora (female) and Kunai (male, came to us last)
I think we just more went on the temperament/type of the dog breeds and didn't worry too much about the sex of the dogs (I know that sometimes that can play a part though for some people) Kunai however, does know that he is the only "dude" and he is a little extra bossy, lol. No offence men (Brad says Kumi can be that way too), lol... he does take advantage of his testosterone though, but I think Kitora's attitude of "no worries, man" diffuses some of his bossiness! lol They did get into one fight over a month ago, and 3 times Kitora tried to walk away from it (I was suuuper proud of her for trying to avoid the conflict as I was waddle running my pregnant self from the barn to try to get into the back yard to help, lol), but I think lil Kuners was having a testosterone moment and just couldn't let it go... Oh, and around the exact same time, he lit into her when she came back into the house after Jason took her out to do chores for some one on one with Jason, those two times and it hasn't threatened to happen since, thankfully. I personally think he was having a hormone flux that amplified the scenario. Those were isolated incidents. He doesn't even try that stuff with Mirra for whatever his reasons.
One other thing that helps our household I think, is our expectations. We allow for each dog to "be themselves" ie: Mirra gets her space at night to rest and recoup her joints if she wants, we have it set up so Kunai doesn't have to worry about anyone stealing his breakfast or dinner (but he still does growl sometimes and receives a "hey there, that's enough" from one of us - so we still try to temper those kind of actions from him) and Ki, well... we don't really have to do anything "special" for Kitora, other than enforce that Kunai isn't allowed to boss her around, lol. She's just always happy. But there are guidelines on how everyone is to treat each other -if you're grumpy - you go to time out (Kunai had a big time out in the back yard by himself after he started the fight with Ki and he wasn't too thrilled with that, we brought her in and looked her over, gave extra loving to her etc...), or are ignored and whoever you were being grumpy to gets the attention from us... or if Mirra seems extra sore we tell her to go to bed to rest. We have had to implement very little of this as of late as Kunai is very smart and catches on very quickly. And, out of doggie "respect" the Kai don't really bug Mirra too bad when she's napping (her arthritis makes her grumps a lot at the end of the day, nothing bad, she just expresses through a short growl that she wants to sleep and not be bothered)... if Mirra is laying by the front of the couch which leads into the living room, they will actually jump over the back of the couch or go all the way around, and she's never even laid into them about it, just a discomfort growl - but she doesn't snap at or ever connect with them, they just give her the berth she needs to be comfortable at that time of day.... For the rest of the day she will initiate play with both of the Kai. For whatever reasons, she really really has taken to all 3 Kai that she has met.
So, long into short - for us I think it's two things really... picking the breed that best fits in with our family dynamics (the Kai and I love Mirra's husky/collie mix) and also our expectations of how we all treat each other and enforcing those expectations in a healthy way that allows the dogs to thrive with each of their own temperaments and needs.
To what @CarabooA is saying: we do this too- we have some similar dogkeeping!
and @tjbart17 Matsu and Juno are ever kissing and grooming and playing. While I think I am Juno's first thought when she wakes up in the morning- she sleeps curled up in my legs- Matsu is her very next thought and after she gives me morning kai kisses wake up call, she goes to Matsu's crate and bows and wiggles and paws his door and looks to me to let her cousin out. He also will curl and lean and greet me first, but then its right on to nibbling Juno's neck...They dont do this to the big dogs, Although Juno and Matsu will lick Sage's mouth and nibble his mane, but not nearly as much as each other.
ChoCho was very shy and reserved before Goro, but that probably has a lot to do with the fact that we dragged her from New Mexico and away from her 20 dog pack! She opened up more with Goro and I think that thanks to having him she was able to deal with her flight to Florida, being in Miami with new people for 4 months, and our move to Orlando. I can't imagine them without each other. It's always Goro and ChoCho. Together. It's weird to think of them apart.
-Wanting to always nap with ChoCho. This was taken May 9th. We picked up Goro May 7th. (Goro: 8 weeks)
-Another nap with ChoCho. Look how much he grew in a week! (Goro: 9.5 weeks)
-Caught Goro wanting to chew his bone at 4 am next too ChoCho (Goro: 12 weeks)
-Wanting to do tricks together (Goro: 13 weeks)
-Sharing a corn lol (Goro:4 months)
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-(Goro: 4 months)
-(Goro: 4 months)
-(Goro: 4 months)
-Chewing on his bone while laying on top of ChoCho (Goro: 5 months)
-(Goro: 5 months)
-ChoCho sits on his face and he doesn't care! (Goro: 8 months)
-(Goro 9: months)
-Partners in crime! (Goro: 9.5 months)
The pictures are fabulous!!!
Im just wondering what the third'll be ;P